Okay guys. I know that the mention of PETA may immediately piss some of you off, but I really encourage you to read a little something about how horribly animals are treated in our society, even watch a PETA undercover slaughterhouse or fur factory video, if you're not already aware of the disturbing reality, or simply sign this petition:

https://secure.peta.org/site/Advocacy?cmd=display&page=UserAction&id=1858

This is one of several... and while you're at it, you can sign the McDonald's and KFC petitions as well.

I'm not very articulate right now. But I can't really imagine what else I would need to say. Please sign it, and maybe encourage your friends and family to sign as well.

Tags: news

  ( blahblah )

Tags: facebook, family, james, people
Current Mood: awake

Why are some people blessed with beauty, and lots of good friends, and fun lives, and happiness, and good relationships, and intelligence and talent...

why?

Why do some people have everything? And why do they torture me with their endless pictures of their great lives on facebook?

Why can't one goddamn thing go right in my life? One. Just one.

He didn't text you. He's not going to text you. He doesn't want to talk to you. Stop checking your phone.



I'm stupid.

L

Tags: stupid

such a big fool.

Pedro says:

to do weddings and that kind of events

blackbirdpie@live.com says:
aw, you're a caterer!
that's so fantastic
I'd call you to cater at my event any day.


really?

I really don't wan to leave my house. In fact, the past couple of days I've just been here. Doing nothing. In pajamas all day. Except for school hours. I get ready just for that, at the last minute.

I'm feeling extremely depressed.

There are things I want to do. I want to go out Christmas shopping today. But I really don't want to get ready or be around anyone. I have most of my sister's gift done but I think I want to do one more thing for her. Then I need to go and sift through the limited selection at the exchange to see if I find anything good enough to get for my mom. Then my dad. Ugh, I'm going to have to look online.

Tags: people
Current Mood: blah

I

am losing my mind.

No, it isn't uncommon for me to be awake at 3 in the morning, but I've taken a dose of sleeping pills and a klonopin and I am still freaking out.

I'm not sure if I've discussed all of the 'disagreements' my father and I have had concerning the cleaning of my room.

I presented several reasons why it is presently impossible for me to just clean it right now. It's in a serious state of disarray, and of course it's not normal to just not have enough motivation to clean the space you're living in, at least enough to be able to walk along the floor without tripping, but it's equally abnormal to be in a state of mind where you'd let it get like that in the first place.

There are several reasons I don't want my father cleaning my room:

- I NEED to be able to clean it. I need to find the motivation.

- I WANT to be able to do it, and I will do it. Slowly.

- I am embarrassed by the state of it

- I am a 20 year old young woman and the things in my room are private. And I do not want my father shuffling through my dirty panties and nude drawings and condom wrappers, masturbation instruments, empty cigarette boxes, papers with all kinds of things written on them. And that should be clear enough. It should be understood.

Of course the other night he cleaned it anyway and I had a full on EXPLOSION of an outburst, screaming crying punching things, kicking, falling to the ground. I was angry. I am a borderliner. I flipped out.

More on that later, if I havent already talked about it... because it's a pretty messed up story.

But as of tonight, there is a NEW issue with my dad 'picking up' my stuff.

He puts it in places that may be obvious to him, but just don't occur to me. Apparently, because after all I've looked for it my CD must be on the roof or buried under our rotting Padre Pio statue. I have looked every reasonable place to look.

This seems silly, right?

Well I have OCD, and it manifests itself in several forms. Trich is one of them. Obsessively looking for things is another. Literally, I will not sleep until I have found what I am looking for.

Right now, it's my Hole CD. Where could it be? Why, I have no idea... I can picture it so clearly in my mind but it's been so long since I've seen it...

And sure as shit it's nowhere to be found.

Of course I'm indirectly blaming my father for the disappearance of the CD, or so I'm sure it seems, but I kept that fucking CD with me everywhere I went for like a month after I got it. WITH me.

It's a rare CD, with a song I can't even download anywhere else, and it's Hole, and it's special, and it's what I'm looking for right now and I just can't find it.

It could be a paperclip. It could be a t-shirt. It could be anything at all, and it has been. But tonight, it is a CD, and I won't sleep until I find it or pass out trying.

Tags: family, ocd
Current Mood: cold

Read this article and tell me what you think. Had you heard about this?

*before you read, note that the photographs are a little disturbing.

Tags: article, news, people, what do you think?
Current Mood: discontent